Friday, February 9

Road Signs

Signs along the roadside as I drove through Minnesota, North Dakota, and Montana:
  • ELK: whole or halves
  • Visit World's Largest Buffalo
  • View from Atop World's Largest Holstein Sue (this sign was directing interested people toward an enormous statue of a Holstein Cow on top of a small, roadside mountain, ballpark lighting highlighted it for all of the interstate traffic to see)
  • World's Only Albino Buffalo

And the best sign I saw was inside the stall of a truck stop bathroom:

  • AcuCleanser: Toilet Seat Cleaner (this sign was attached to a handpump for some sort of antibacterial cleaner. It had a diagram of a hand extracting the liquid from the container and rubbing it on the toilet seat! Was I having a nightmare? That is completely absurd!)

Each additional sign sparked a tiny twinge of wonder, amazement, and fear within me. What kind of land am I voluntarily moving into? A land where (obviously) everything is compared to that of everything else in the "world"? A land where a twenty foot statue of a Holstein Cow named Sue is a 'sight to see'? A land where one is encouraged to rub their hand on a truckstop toilet seat in order to cleanse it of germs? A land where you can buy Elk in whole or halves?

I am definitely entering an unkown land. What I will experience? That is to be determined.

5 comments:

Melissa/Mel said...

wow. that's all i can say. wow. the fact that there's an anti-bacterial agent involved is not enough to make me want to rub my hand on a truck-stop toilet. i keep thinking of that an laughing out loud, which probably makes everyone else here at the library wonder what sort of psycho i am...
Mel

Andrew & Alaina said...

I hope you passed on the toilet seat cleaning! :) Hope you had a good trip.

Kristi said...

Aren't signs wonderful! We think that they tell a lot about a place! We've been cracking up here in China at the ones that got lost in translation.

Kostaroff said...

As a dear sister of yours once said.... "That's so nass." Hilarious and disgusting all at once. Thanks for the laugh. We hope your experiences continue to be memorable!!

EmilyAnne said...

Really one of the grossest things I can think of. In fact, whenever something gross has happened since then, that sign is one of the two benchmarks I have for how truly gross something can be. The other, you also experienced. Had something to do with Katie removing her diaper at naptime and pooping all over the crib. Just in case you forgot.